The Little Things

Today I woke up extremely down. I know you're asking how can this have any possible credence? Hang on, it does.
I was feeling inadequate. Very inadequate. I felt like I could never become the Christian God intended me to be because I have too many issues. It seemed to me that I would never have the stability that I see in other Christians. Or the faith and strength. I felt horrible about it. I know God doesn't expect me to be perfect. I know He knows that I am weak. Yet I still felt like a lost cause. A hopeless, helpless, pansy of a Christian.

With these thoughts and feelings filling my thoughts I stopped talking about it. (My mom wanted to know what was wrong and I found it near impossible to explain.) So I went and hopped in the shower. And if you know me, which you don't that's why I'm going to tell you, I sing in the shower. No, seriously, I sing in the shower all the time. I've even gotten in trouble for it a couple times.
So I'm singing, trying to calm my thoughts and all the feelings of hopelessness. After singing for a while Ecclesiastes 9:11 popped into my head. Well, it was kind of Ecc. 9:11, I don't have that verse memorized, so it popped into my head a little butchered. But I started singing it. This is what came out:

The battle is not to the strong,
nor the victory to the brave in heart,
but time and opportunity
comes to the weak and to the poor
and there is hope for me
in the Lord.

Then I looked out my window at the leaves of this tree that's right up against the window. It's been raining for the past few days and all morning it had been dark and stormy. But now the sun was shining and reflecting off each raindrop that had gathered on the leaves of that tree. And it was beautiful. Sometimes God does those little things, and it feels like He did it just for you. Sometimes it's a verse that comes to mind or a song, or the beauty of nature or whatever else it is that calms you. And you know, He did do it, just for you.



"I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all."
Ecclesiastes 9:11