A friend of mine asked me a while a go what I though about casual dating.
"What do I think about casual dating?! Oh, you didn't just ask me that!" I thought.
I have talked to many many girls about their dating relationships. I've had conversation after conversation about dating among young people. And I have voiced my opinion about high-school dating, casual dating, when to date, how to date, what to call dating etc...etc... So I automatically assumed that I would have a lot to say. Wrong.
I was almost wordless as I tried to explain clearly why I thought the way I did about casual dating. Voicing your opinion is easy, explaining your opinion is not. I decided to start from a basic level; answering the question,
What is casual dating?
Casual dating is using a romantic relationship to fill emotional voids. It is dating without plans or inclinations of a future with the other person. It is selfish and benefit only you. You are seeking some-THING not some-ONE. You want what a relationship offers, not what it entails.
To me, this is casual dating. It is reckless. Selfish. And dangerous.
So when I use the term "casual dating" I do not mean, you took your girlfriend to the park and McDonalds, instead of taking her to a fancy restaurant and a Broadway play. I mean, you took your boyfriend's heart and drug it through the dirt, dropping it on the next girls doorstep when you were "done with it".
If you are in a group of young people and ask them what it the one thing that ask for advice on most often, I guarantee you dating is in the top three answers. It's a topic of intense debate and discussion in youth groups all across America. Christian book stores are overflowing with informational books, devotionals, and study guides on how to run this area of your life. So what could I possibly have to add to the masses of opinions and guidelines? Maybe nothing. I am not a counselor, or a psychologist, I can't give you a ten-step guide to making your life perfect, or a fail-safe method to get your high-school relationship to make a good marriage.
But I am a young person, going through young person issues, seeing lots of other young people make lots of relationship decisions. And I understand what it is like to be surrounded by a sea of information and feel like no one is answering your questions. So maybe what I have to say will help you. Maybe it won't. But if I can get you to stop for a fraction of a second and think about WHY you do what you do. Then I have contributed something.